What we are talking about:
Calvin Johnson
Fantasy Illuminati at WR
Austin or Dez
Who are you keeping?
Hines Ward
Worthy of the Hall of Fame?
Let me tell you something, Kate Upton rules the world. Not only is she dating Mark Sanchez and Tim Tebow (but probably neither); not only is she on the cover of the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue; not only is she doing Carl's Jr. ads; she's back at the top of Like/dislike. That's a game changer, right there.
But while Upton is dominating, she's still in a bit of controversy because people want her Carl's Jr. ads pulled because they are too racy. Hey, if you don't like the ads, maybe you just don't order western bacon from Carl's Jr. and let the rest of us enjoy it?
We all have choices to make, just like in fantasy football. I present my list of receiver keepers (you can check out the quarterbacks and running backs, too).
(Yes, I understand it was a little gratuitous but having Upton and Tebow in one story means clicks, and well, I need to get paid so I can continue to eat western bacon cheeseburgers.)
And without further ado ...
Let's kick things off with some dilemmas which face Rank's 11, starting with Miles Austin. He had a down year, and Laurent Robinson sure looked good in his place. But expect the Cowboys to keep throwing, and for Austin to reestablish himself as the team's top receiver. …
I might be forced to keep Austin and Robinson this year. Odds are I won't start the season with either of them, but both can be used as trade fodder. …
I also have Brandon Marshall, who I project for a good season with Matt Moore at quarterback. He'll have a great season if Peyton Manning lands in Miami. Marshall is easily the most overlooked No. 1 receiver. …
ImageSpeaking of Miami, we're just weeks away from Wrestlemania. CM Punk and Chris Jericho will steal the show. Punk's promo with Jericho on Monday was pure gold. And the way Punk broke down Jericho's arguments should give you a good insight into why Punk isn't allowed to tangle with the Rock. …
One more note on Rank's 11, I tried to see if Kenny Britt was available in Week 16 because I was going to sneak him on to my roster with the intention of keeping him. I like him to rebound this season. …
Dwayne Bowe will improve on his five touchdowns in 2012. The Chiefs are also in the mix for Manning (don't see it happening), and I shouldn't have to tell you what to do if it happens. …
Larry Fitzgerald can have great seasons no matter who is throwing him the ball. He even put up great numbers with Leinart under center. And again, the Cardinals are my pick to land Manning this season. …
Why Arizona? Manning isn't spiteful enough to go to Houston to play against the Colts twice a year. He won't want to compete against Eli in New York. He'll want to play in a dome with a team without super-high expectations. …
Calvin Johnson is the leader of the Fantasy Illuminati at receiver. If you're thinking of releasing him, email me and invite me to your fantasy league. And if somebody in your league puts him in the redraft, thank them. I would say kick them out of the league, but every league needs a version of the Skins to make quirky moves. …
Vincent Jackson will probably remain in San Diego, so I would keep him. The only situation which could kick him out of the Fantasy Illuminati would be for him to end up with the Jets. …
Mike Wallace will remain in Pittsburgh and continue to put up great numbers. And if he leaves, he still puts up great numbers. Except, again, if he ends up with the Jets. …
A lot of us were burned by Dre Johnson's injury-plagued 2011 campaign, but he's still an elite receiver who should be on your team. Even if Houston is going to lead the league in rushing. …
ImageSpeaking of Houston, is the Astros' move to the American League done? I wish they would move the Angels to the National League. The Angels play an NL-style of baseball anyway. Actually, this will be the first time in years the Angels will actually have a good designated hitter. …
ImageThe Angels signed Albert Pujols, just in case you missed it. Angels single-game tickets go on sale Saturday and I'm camping out for tickets to the home opener. I don't want to know what they will cost otherwise.
Keep Jordy Nelson and Greg Jennings. What, it's not like the Packers are suddenly going to start running the ball. …
I often let personal feelings get in the way of my fantasy decisions (though, I did have Eli on a number of my fantasy teams). So Steve Smith is going to be a keeper if, for no other reason, because he's a delightful guest on the Dave Dameshek Football Program (available on iTunes). …
Victor Cruz is trending up. He'll improve on his nine touchdown receptions from 2011. Expect big things from him. Hakeem Nicks will continue to dominate, too. …
Not sure what the Patriots are waiting for with Wes Welker. He's a keeper if he stays with the Patriots, but I'd really have to think twice if he ended up with another team. Tom Brady can make receivers look really good. …
ImageDolph Ziggler might be the WWE's Brady -- as in he makes others look good. I took the wife to a couple of WWE house shows last weekend (#husbandoftheyear) and Ziggler is so impressive in person. If you watched Kane choke slam Ziggler and R-Truth on RAW last week, notice how Ziggler sells it. And it's much more impressive in person. …
ImageYou know who showed up at the House Show? It was the Funkasaurus himself, Brodus Clay. I don't get why this guy was pulled off TV. Give him some time. The one guy I really wanted to see but wasn't there was Cody Rhodes. …
ImageNotice Kobe Bryant is wearing the Cody Rhodes mask now after being the victim of a cheap shot in the NBA All-Star Game? Well, I didn't see it, because I wouldn't condescend to watch. Take a cue from the NFL guys and mail it in during the All-Star festivities. …
Julio Jones will eventually become the fantasy superstar in Atlanta, but don't overlook Roddy White, who finished seventh in fantasy points among receivers in 2011 -- a surprising stat for a guy who had an "off" year. …
A.J. Green is going to be a stud, don't let him go. The Bengals will go to a RBBC, but nobody is going to challenge Green as the top receiver on the club. …
Percy Harvin was going to start on the dislike list, but what makes him so dangerous is his running ability. Adrian Peterson is going to be slowed, so Harvin will become a bigger part of the Vikings offense. …
Congratulations to the Vikings for getting their stadium deal. Too bad it's going to be a retractable roof -- understandable because if the government is kicking in money, the stadium should be available for multi-use purposes, like the Final Four in addition to the Super Bowl. Maybe the Vikings could keep the roof open in December. …
ImageI'm telling you, the Los Angeles Rams would have had a few more Super Bowl appearances in the 1970s if the Vikings had a roof on the Met. …
It's funny to look back at your team's previous keepers, and I find it hilarious I kept Mike Williams after his rookie season. Well, hilariously depressing. Williams is going back into the draft this year. He might rebound in 2012, but not as a member of my team. …
Stevie Johnson is also going back into the draft. He's far too inconsistent and the Bills really have to be kicking themselves for Ryan Fitzpatrick's undeserved contract. …
Injuries forced me to start Davone Bess at one point last season, and while I like having a former Rainbow Warrior on my squad, I'm not keeping him. He'd be a slight sleeper if Manning is in Miami, but I'm not keeping him under any circumstance. …
ImageThe thing that really depresses me about the Rock nowadays is he comes on a PG wrestling show, utters a few sorta blue words and it looks like he's edgy. What happened to the Rock I used to know? Oh that's right, he's making the "Tooth Fairy." Now it's coming to the point where I'm rooting for John Cena. Help me. …
ImageAnd seriously Portland, what was up with you chanting anything that Rocky said? You're better than that. How could you after the way Cena took him apart? …
ImageBut to backtrack, I don't fault anybody for making a movie like the "Tooth Fairy." I bet the DVD sales are through the roof. I'd do that movie for the money. …
I was able to add Reggie Wayne at one point last season, but he's going back into the draft. There's been talk of him being a package deal with Peyton because I guess this is Little League. But I would reconsider if both landed in Arizona. …
Not sure Wayne could match what Anquan Boldin did in Arizona, but he'd be better than Early Doucet and Andre Roberts. …
The Raiders were such a bummer last season. Well, they didn't make the playoffs, so I guess America won. But from a fantasy perspective, trying to figure out who to play between Denarius Moore, Jacoby Ford and the other curtain jerkers was an exhausting circumstance I'd rather not relive in 2012. And it's not going to be better this season. …
The Jets quarterback situation (Mark Sanchez) keeps me from trusting Santonio Holmes. Maybe the Steelers knew what they were doing when they let him go. But the Steelers always seem to know. …
Antonio Brown has a lot of potential in the Steelers offense, and he should get his chance this season. He's good, but he's somebody to target in the draft, not as a keeper. Unless you play in a league where you give up a draft pick in the round you drafted him. Then he would be excellent as a 15th rounder. …
Sad commentary when "Dancing with the Stars" is going to be what gets Hines Ward into the Pro Football Hall of Fame. Look, Ward was a nice player who did a lot of things well, but wasn't one of the best of his generation. The Hall of Fame has evolved into this weird popularity contest which makes Pro Bowl balloting look legitimate by comparison. …
If "Dancing with the Stars" is going to get Ward into the Hall of Fame, will it do the same for Donald Driver? I mean, they are similar players though Ward has better numbers. But hey, if Driver smiles nice and wins over the DWTS audience he probably has a better chance of getting in than Charles Haley. …
ImageSeriously, Ward is considered a Hall of Fame lock by some, but the guy who broke the NFL's color barrier, Kenny Washington isn't in the Pro Football Hall of Fame. I really need to be on the Hall of Fame committee. …
ImageSpeaking of bad ideas, MLB's wild card expansion is really a misguided attempt to make sure the Red Sox get into the playoffs. First, it won't work. And second, the season finale of the 2011 baseball season was one of the greatest nights in the sport's history. The night would have been meaningless if the Sox and Braves were already in the playoffs. …
ImageFootball playoffs work well, it makes sense. But when you play 162 games in a season, you can probably scale back the playoffs a touch. The wild card is one of the worst things to happen to baseball. It's one of those things we wish we could disinvent. This isn't a training exercise is it, sir? (Sorry, just watched "The Rock.") ...
Mario Manningham is a nice receiver, who did well for the Giants last season. But some team is going to overpay for him (hello, Baltimore) and he's going to prove he's not a No. 1 receiver. …
But hey, Manningham had an awesome catch in the Super Bowl. Let's put him in the Hall of Fame! …
Dez Bryant is such a tantalizing prospect, but there's no way I'm keeping him. He was outdone by Laurent Robinson last year, and he's still competing with Austin and Jason Witten. Bryant hasn't show the professionalism to be an elite receiver yet. Until he does, he's in the redraft. …
Bryant has been more disappointing than the Green Lantern movie. Is it too soon to do a reboot of that franchise? …
ImageMarvel quickly realized its mistake with "The Hulk" and quickly reworked another movie. But Marvel typically does a better job than DC with its movies -- the current Batman movies notwithstanding -- and show things can be done correctly. Bummer because DC has better superheroes. …
DeSean Jackson never figured out he was supposed to play above his head during his contract year, not have the worst season of his career. Do you want to deal with that? I'd rather have Jeremy Maclin, but would be inclined to pass on both. …
Brandon Lloyd would be a good choice if he stayed with the St. Louis FC, but he's going to get lost in the shuffle if he joins the Patriots, falling behind Welker, Gronk and Aaron Hernandez. …
I'd have no problem adding Lloyd in the draft, but just don't expect No. 1 production from him. To be fair, he's going to be better than Chad Ochocinco was with the Patriots. Hardly a ringing endorsement. …
Marques Colston won't go to a team like Chicago and turn into a big-time No. 1 receiver. And if he stays with the Saints, he suffers from being in a receiver committee. …
Demaryius Thomas has a lot of potential, but there's no reason to keep one of Tim Tebow's receivers.
For the record, you can submit your fantasy questions to NFL Fantasy Live, Michael Fabiano or me on Twitter. But realize, NFL Fantasy Live has 45,000 followers, and Fabiano has 50,000. Me? Just 13. See, the odds are better I will answer your question, so hit me up both via Twitter or via Facebook. Also be sure to catch the latest "Dave Dameshek Football Program."