Welcome to the Around The NFL End Around, a weekly look back at the world of the National Football League. Dan Hanzus serves as your guide.
It was a good week for ...
1. Devin Hester: I'm sure there were #hottakes out there Friday calling Hester a Hall of Famer. He's not. But 20 return TDs is special. And doing it with Deion in the house was a nice bit of dramatic flair.
2. Josh Gordon: His NFL suspension has been shortened, and his boss at the car lot is letting him keep his job. Victories all over the place.
3. Tom Brady: When you're TB12, every week is a good week. He reminded us of this by sharing his post-college resume. That's how you #TBT.
It was a bad week for ...
1. Adrian Peterson & Greg Hardy: When will we see theseguys on the football field again? There's no precedent here, but I'd assume not any time soon.
2. Carson Palmer: The veteran quarterback has a nerve issue in his shoulder and nobody seems to know how to treat it. This might not end well.
3. Lovie Smith: Smith was supposed to bring the Bucs back to relevance after Greg Schiano mucked everything up last year. Schiano never fell behind 56-0 on national television.
I really want to believe this ...
... and yet, I cannot. A Coughlin playlist would likely include some early-period Sinatra, a collection of Hank Williams rarities and perhaps a Dylan album from his Christian period. It would set the team on fire. Or, the team would set the facility on fire.
Tweet of the week
People Who Are The Worst will inevitably read a tweet like this and say "TMI," which is one of my least favorite expressions in the world. In truth, this is a welcome elevator diversion and further proof that Steve Smith Sr. is unconquerable.
How much do you want to exchange your Ray Rice jersey?
If you're reading this and are standing on the back of that line, you have to ask yourself: "Would I pay $50 to move to the front right now?" If so, place your Rice jersey in a refuse container and click here.
Scott Mitchell is (on) The Biggest Loser
I watch this show with my wife. I don't know why. It just happens. The latest update: The former Lions QB shed another 10 pounds by the end of Thursday's episode and is down 33 pounds to 333. If that sounds like an unhealthy amount of weight loss given the time period, you're probably right. But hey, he's still in line to win the big money!
Anyway, the above screen grab comes from the part of the episode in which a doctor shows Mitchell a graphic rendering of what he'll look like if he reaches his target weight. You'll notice the doctor took the time to put Mitchell in Hot Dad clothes from a virtual J. Crew store. It was weird.
Quote of the Week
"Pizza business is pretty good out here, believe it or not, due to some recent law changes."
-- Peyton Manning, drawing a deft correlation between his booming Papa John's empire and Colorado's move to a more green-friendly lifestyle.
Mike Smith has charisma for days
If CBS producers watched Hard Knocks this summer, they probably would've thought twice about wiring Mike Smith for sound in Thursday's bloodbath at the Georgia Dome. I'd call the above reel a greatest hits of his sideline performance, but only in the way that, say, Aaron Carter has a greatest hits. It exists, you can consume it if you choose, but you'll probably come away from it unmoved and a little bit confused.
The best part -- let's call it the "" of the montage -- occurs when Smith approaches an emotional Devin Hester after the wideout's record-breaking punt return.
Perfect.
Return of the Ying Yang Twins
The Saints announced they will return to playing the 2004 Ying Yang Twins club hit "Halftime (Stand Up and Get Crunk)" after touchdowns this season. The song became an anthem during the Saints' 2009 Super Bowl season but had been fazed out of the Super Dome mix last season.
Now it's back.
"When people in the stands are into 'Crunk,' it seems to be easy for them to get other people around them back into it," said Saints exec Ben Hales, according to The Times-Picayune. "The people who are super-'Crunks' would make their displeasure known that we weren't playing it. We'd hear about it after games and in surveys."
That is the best quote from a professional football executive ... ever.
Hero of the Week: Mike Smith
This may seem contradictory after everything above, but I actually love the big galoot. He's like a well-meaning stepdad doing the best that he can.
Villain of the Week: Packers ticket scammers
Cheeseheads are the most innocent of all NFL fans. They're good-natured folk who close up shop on Sundays, place dairy props upon their heads and root for the home team in a deeply earnest way. So shame on the unnamed 37-year-old man who scammed approximately 20 would-be ticket buyers out of a total of $50,000.
Seriously, how could you steal from people like this? Bad human.
Until next time ...
The latest Around The NFL Podcast recaps the Falcons' lopsided win over the Bucs and previews every other game in Week 3.