Each week, the Around The League writer with the worst record in picks has to write our introduction. This week, that man is Dan Hanzus.
I'm back.
This is the second time I'm writing this stupid intro, and I suspect it won't be the last if I don't pull it together. My 14-2 masterpiece in Week 2 now seems like a distant memory. Mediocrity has been my calling card. The Champion Of The Underdog® needs to re-capture his lost swagger.
But how? Parity in the NFL is more pronounced than ever. I counted seven games you accurately could describe as toss-ups this week. This has become a war of attrition.
Time to man up.
BILLS AT BROWNS (Thurs., 8 p.m. ET, NFL Network)
ATL is not circling the wagons on the Buffalo Bills.
Dan Hanzus, Kevin Patra, Gregg Rosenthal, Marc Sessler, Chris Wesseling
SAINTS AT BEARS (Sun., 1 p.m. ET, FOX)
Marc Sessler
Dan Hanzus, Kevin Patra, Gregg Rosenthal, Chris Wesseling
PATRIOTS AT BENGALS (Sun., 1 p.m. ET, CBS)
Kevin Patra, Gregg Rosenthal, Marc Sessler
Dan Hanzus, Chris Wesseling
LIONS AT PACKERS (Sun., 1 p.m. ET, FOX)
Mind-blowing stat of the game: The Lions haven't won at Lambeau since 1991.
Dan Hanzus, Kevin Patra, Gregg Rosenthal, Marc Sessler, Chris Wesseling
SEAHAWKS AT COLTS (Sun., 1 p.m. ET, FOX)
Dan Hanzus, Marc Sessler
Kevin Patra, Gregg Rosenthal, Chris Wesseling
RAVENS AT DOLPHINS (Sun., 1 p.m. ET, CBS)
Dan Hanzus, Kevin Patra, Marc Sessler, Chris Wesseling
Gregg Rosenthal
EAGLES AT GIANTS (Sun., 1 p.m. ET, FOX)
Kevin Patra, Gregg Rosenthal, Marc Sessler, Chris Wesseling
Dan Hanzus
JAGUARS AT RAMS (Sun., 1 p.m. ET, CBS)
Dan Hanzus, Kevin Patra, Gregg Rosenthal, Marc Sessler, Chris Wesseling
CHIEFS AT TITANS (Sun., 1 p.m. ET, CBS)
Dan Hanzus, Kevin Patra, Marc Sessler
Gregg Rosenthal, Chris Wesseling
PANTHERS AT CARDINALS (Sun., 4:05 p.m. ET, FOX)
Dan Hanzus, Kevin Patra, Gregg Rosenthal, Marc Sessler, Chris Wesseling
Still some room on the Cardinals' bandwagon.
BRONCOS AT COWBOYS (Sun., 4:25 p.m. ET, CBS)
Dan Hanzus, Kevin Patra, Gregg Rosenthal, Marc Sessler, Chris Wesseling
Does anybody want to win the NFC East?
TEXANS AT 49ERS (Sun., 8:30 p.m. ET, NBC)
Chris Wesseling
Dan Hanzus, Kevin Patra, Gregg Rosenthal, Marc Sessler
CHARGERS AT RAIDERS (Sun., 11:35 p.m. ET, NFL Network)
Dan Hanzus, Gregg Rosenthal, Marc Sessler, Chris Wesseling
Kevin Patra
JETS AT FALCONS (Mon., 8:40 p.m. ET, ESPN)
Mark Sanchez was lost for the season this week, and he will be missed.
Dan Hanzus, Kevin Patra, Gregg Rosenthal, Marc Sessler, Chris Wesseling
Week 4 record
Dan Hanzus: 7-8
Kevin Patra: 8-7
Gregg Rosenthal: 11-4
Marc Sessler: 7-8
Chris Wesseling: 8-7
Season record
Dan Hanzus: 37-26
Kevin Patra: 38-25
Gregg Rosenthal: 43-20
Marc Sessler: 40-23
Chris Wesseling: 38-25
First-place finishes
Dan Hanzus: 1
Kevin Patra: 1
Gregg Rosenthal: 2
Marc Sessler: 1
Chris Wesseling: 1
Last-place finishes
Dan Hanzus: 2
Kevin Patra: 1
Gregg Rosenthal: 0
Marc Sessler: 1
Chris Wesseling: 1
Hero picks*
Dan Hanzus: 3
Kevin Patra: 0
Gregg Rosenthal: 3
Marc Sessler: 2
Chris Wesseling: 1
* Only person to pick a game right.
Around the League experts made their picks for the Week 5 games. You can make your own picks with the NFL Weekly Pick 'em fantasy game.
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Follow Lyle, the Around The League intern, on Twitter @InternLyle.