His brainstorm involves a steel-cage match pitting Washington's verbose tight end against the endlessly under-fire Tony Romo.
In his weekly interview with WJFK-FM on Monday, Cooley joked that he'd quickly dispose of Dallas' quarterback by channeling his proven grappling experience.
"For me to beat Tony? I'm going to be honest, I don't know what kind of cage-fighting skills he has," Cooley said. "I would probably try to incorporate my wrestling ability, like when I was in high school. Obviously it's been a while, but I didn't like to beat people fast. I like to embarrass 'em a little bit. Like, take a 24-point lead, and then just play with it a little bit."
Cooley wouldn't let that final point go, acknowledging the thrill he felt at seeing Romo self-implode Sunday against the Lions.
"It's so good," Cooley said. "... It's amazing, amazing to watch him choke like that. I'm just saying, I'm up 24 points in the third quarter, if I'm the head coach, I feel like I could probably just take a knee for the rest of the game, punt it away and there's no way that Detroit's going to drive on you that many times. The only way you're going to give up that many points is turnovers, right? It's hilarious to watch him throw pick sixes, too, back to back. I loved it."
It would pale in comparison to this epic, but we like Cooley's chances to win a cage match against the lankier, volatile Romo.