SNACKS
Ditch your home plate in favor of stacking a box of our Khalil Mack sackerjacks, coated in Derek Carramel and Oakland corn Colisyrup. If you're lucky, you may even find a Lombardi prize inside! Note: If our Bills get their molasses kicked, you're welcome to ask for our sunflower seeding, though an impending strike three for Rex could be cause for a changeup.
In a year of many twists, try our hot and cold Philly soft Wentzel made of a Cincinnati soured-dough season and sprinkled with early Eagles' hype that should've been taken with a grain of sea salt. Covered in LaFellow mustard, it's not for a lack of Eifert that our Bengals are in a bind, though it may be too late to be "dugout" of this hole.
FAVORITES
You've got to try our DeAngeloaded nachos with tortilla chips shots covered in picOdell gallo, reTyed beans and a sprints of Elime Manning. Can't seem to find a certain second-year wideout on the board? You're not alone! Ask the counter for our secret menu to unlock our dangerous Sammie ghost pepper sauce.
You'reee out!... Of your mind if you don't take a swing at our Boldin-flavored Coby beef burger with cheddar Drew cheese served on a sesame Snead bun. Topped with Darius Slaw, this combo also comes with our Golden Tater tots, French Quarter fries and a one NFC North liter bottle of fizzling NOLA cola.
Stop by our snack bar-kevious for a Brian Quick bite of our barbecue Kenny Brittsket and Greg Zuerloin steak sandwich served on a Cunninghamburger bun with a side of Devin McCorny bread. Note: It may not be juicy when the Rams fail to devour our AFC beast, but you can always take comfort in knowing you have ate and ate!
A ballpark must, get yourself our 3rd-and-long DeAndre HopDog made of Wisconsin-style Brockwurst wrapped up in Green Baycon and served on Fuller's droppy seed bun. Topped in Lambeau wind chili and Julius jalapeno Peppers, return your palate to the neutral zone by downing 16 pounces of Jadeveon browney ale.
DESSERT
Clink your glasses to toast Carroll's quest to Lockett up the division with an ice cream Sundae Night treat served in a Jonathan Stewvenir helmet with rainbow Jimmies Graham, Cassius Marshmallows and chocolate Graham ganache. Plus, we promise you'll be blown away by all the defensive goodies that fit under our Seattle salary ballcap!
For more mirth from Emma Sauerwein, follow here on Twitter and listen weekly to the Dave Dameshek Football Program.
